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LAinGA - You truly will be amazed at the healing process. It was only a couple of months later that I felt like "me" again and no longer like a stranger in my own skin. TR was a miracle that gave me my life back and brought me back to my husband and kids.
Just hang in there. You'll be amazed at how better you feel after. You'll want to start doing things again that you stopped due to the PTLS. I'm still amazed at how better I feel. Now when I sit down with my kids and play with them, which I couldn't do before because I had no patients, I thank God for leading me to Dr. Berger. I just feel so much more at peace and so will you.
My heart reaches out to you regarding your mother. We all just want validation, especially from our mothers, and when that doesn't happen it really cuts to the bone. Just know in your heart that this is what's right for you and that's what it's all about, YOU, and you feeling better.
I hope time flies for you over the next month. You will be so surprised by how much better you feel afterward. You can read my blog about my story if you go to blog section. I have been relieved of about every symptom I had.
It takes about 4 weeks for an antideppresant to start working and then you will be having your TR. It takes alot longer to get off those meds once on...so I would suggest wait and see how you feel after. I came off my antideppresant since I've had my TR...its great!
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Thanks again all for the support. It is increasingly hard to deal with as more time goes by. Everyone has been correct, the busier I have made myself, the better I am. Funny - you are right about the man - he doesn't get it... not a clue - just "you're sick again"... I pretty much stopped going out and doing stuff about 2 years ago which has been an issue between us - like tomorrow is his birthday - he is going out with friends all day and evening... he doesn't get why that upsets me - duh... anyway... I will make it through because I have found you ladies and now I know there is hope for recovery. The non-support from my mom is hard to take - you are correct - she is very old school. She has something to say about everything and if I go against her way at all, I am considered stupid or an idiot. The words hurt. It just makes it hard because my parents moved in with me back in August so they have been watching me go down every month and that is their opinion. As far as the TR is concerned, my two best friends know and are jumping with joy - one is actually going with me when I have it done. My oldest daughter, 18, knows and is all for it. The other daughter, 10, doesn't know anything because she would not keep her mouth shut... I do think this is private decision for whatever reason. Anyway... thanks again. I am sure that I will be back many times between now and 02.16 and I appreciate the support with the bottom of my heart. I didn't realize just how much of a difference it would make but let me tell you - it really has today! Much happiness to each of you, ~LA
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LA, I am sorry you are not getting the support you need from home. Be sure the boards will give you the support and encouragement you need. Lean on these great ladies for any and everything you may need. Also, if you have any questions or concerns, you can email or call us here at the office. Try and be good to yourself while you await these last few weeks before surgery. Good luck, and we will see you soon!
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LAinGA, I'm sorry that you are feeling this way. I would bet all of us felt some kind of nervousness and emotional as it got closer to our TRs. It's normal, even when you know it's absolutely right for you for whatever reason you've decided to go thru this.
Our men can be right there next to us the whole way, and still would not be able to totally understand, because it's not their bodies, but once this is done, and your's sees you getting "better", and not "sick all the time", he will be grateful for you, and happy.
Your mother...I'm sorry. A lot of family members sometimes react that way. Your mother is from a time of "Old School" where the only "fix" for the female problems is a hysterectomy, which can cause all sorts of other problems due to early menopause, etc. We only told my DH's parents, and my oldest daughter about our decision to have a TR, because we felt it was a private manner between us, and didn't want others to have to opportunity to "rain on our parade" I would have told anyone that reacted negatively, that they doesn't have to understand my decisions or accept it, but I expect them to respect them, and not say anything negatively to me about them, or I will not discuss it anymore with them, and they won't get the pleasure of being involved.
I agree with everyone else that has said, keep yourself occupied. The more time you have to just sit around, the more anxious you are going to get.
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Thank you all for your kind words and advise. I am putting them all in place! It certainly does help. I am sure each of you felt the way I do before your procedures... I have been telling myself that in less than a month, I will feel so much better... it helps a bit... at times the time seems like it is so far away but I know it will be here before I know it. I have pretty much withdrawl from everything and everyone. I know it bites but for me, it helps - people are always asking me to do things or just want to talk and I can't seem to do it anymore - I just want to be left alone right now. I know they mean well but I am just so sick of trying to explain what I am going through and having the "dumb looks" stare at me all the time. Okay - I am done with the complaints (again) and I am going to go and organize my drawers Thanks again! ~LA
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I also went through many emotions, anger, frustration, fear etc, and I completely withdrew from everyone and everything, I just couldn't deal. As soon as the surgery was done though, I had complete peace, knowing that it was the right choice. If you can even imagine your symptoms going away, maybe that will help...they literally begin disappearing! Try to put your head to the future where you will be yourself again. Hopefully that will encourage/get you through these last few days.
I too became very emotional and nervous about the surgery. I couldn't eat and was experiencing anxiety. I also recommend what Anita said about just trying to stay busy. You're almost there. You'll feel so much better after that you won't need any meds. So, if you can hold off try but if you need something, maybe you should talk to your MD. There are other meds you can take as needed for anxiety that help to calm you down instead of an everyday antidepressant. You're going to be so excited that you won't need anything after because you're going to feel sooo good.
I feel your pain about support. Most everyone supported me but I always knew that they really didn't understand why I was doing it. My sister wanted me to take meds, birth control and antidepressants. People who have not walked in our shoes just DON'T and CAN'T get it.d Why would I do that if a surgery can help me permanently??!! We are here for you to support you. And I second what Anita said about men, they are CLUELESS!!!
Stay busy and know that it is right around the corner. Lisa
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gez LA, I think you are just stressed out. I remember being on here constantly researching and reading what others posted. I was obsessed before we went, and worried sick about leaving my kids and pets, having the surgery, the ride back home, starting back to work, and of course getting a BFP.
Having a support system works wonders, and it looks like the boards will have to be yours. Don't even discuss it with your mom if she's going to be negative. Your friend probably doesn't share the enthusiasm because she's at a different place in her life, and men...well they haven't got a clue how all of this affects a woman, other than she's moody.
If you can find a way to deal with the stress other than the medication, then do it. If you feel like you need an antidepressant, then talk with your doctor. Since this is not a chronic situation, I think I'd find some other things to do, like visit this board, make lists, write down your thoughts, take walks, or my old stand-by, clean house, and just work out my concerns that way. I hate taking meds if not absolutely necessary, and besides, it takes a couple weeks for the meds to work.
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Looking at my calendar, I am only on day 19 of this cycle... they are usually 30-32 days... I "usually" don't start feeling really bad until day 25-26 but for some reason today, I just keep crying and can't control my emotions. I go from crying softly to uncontrolling sobs that rack my entire body... Typically, I write in my journal or stay busy around the house but today - NOTHING is helping! On the TR - I have 26 days to go... I am getting nervous about that - why, I don't know especially since I know that it can only help me... I do know that it bums me out that I don't have the support of my family (my mother plain told me that I was an idiot for considering TR and not hysterectomy). My best friend supports me but I am so sure that she is tired of hearing about it every time we talk. The man doesn't understand a thing except that I won't be "sick all the time" and now we will have the possibility of having a baby... Suggestion was made to me that maybe I should go back on my anti-depressant to help me cope until the TR and during recovery then possibly come back off it... so, my point - any suggestions from someone that actually knows about this "hell" that I am dealing with?? Thanks much, ~LA
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