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Tandi – Well said! Patience will get us all that precious miracle someday!! I think you have such a great attitude and personality; I admire how well you go with the flow.
Ellen – Awe poor little guy. So young to have to deal with surgery. Hope he feels better soon and the surgery helps with the sleeping. Egg lives for 12-24 hours after being released…sure seems like such a small window of time doesn’t it! Sure it doesn’t help either if you are not feeling well. Hope you were successful with dh last night
Michelle – So good to hear from you! We miss you too!!! Sounds like you are in great spirits. Sorry about the blocked tube, but hey it only takes one and you are right it will happen and we sure can’t speed it up..so patience is key! Hope you have fun on your trip!!!
Kimberly – I HATE when you type a huge post and lose it..the second (or third) post is never as good! Sorry about the negative, but if you had bleeding, it is probably a good thing you got a negative this month on the chance that something could have been wrong. Hang in there, I just know we are all due for some good news SOON!
As for me, I do have regular cycles, but my thyroid messes with me so bad, catching an egg when my levels are normal seems to be impossible. From what I have read and heard my TSH levels need to be around 1-2 to be functioning properly to conceive. Well I had my blood drawn Friday thinking it was off again, and sure enough my levels are 0.25. I don’t think anyone on our thread has a thyroid issue, but I just need to vent…as it is SOOOO frustrating. I don’t understand why my levels are so hard to keep in check. I just had them checked 8 weeks ago and they were in a normal range then, I change nothing about me and continue taking that same dose, same time daily and they are off again. I know we all have our obstacles and I don’t mean to be negative, I am just so completely confused why my levels just don’t stay in check. I started out with what is called graves disease and I had radiation therapy to basically dissolve my thyroid so now I am hypothyroid and take a pill daily to regulate that part of my body. I have had this for 13 years now and I have had to go for blood draws every 6 -8 weeks since then. Dr’s told me when I was diagnosed that once my levels are in check, I would only have to come back once every 2 years for a check…yeah that certainly has never happened. To top it off I can adjust my dose but in order for my levels to adjust it takes a good 3 weeks, which means I am for surely out this month. I know patience and time will get us our miracle, I just worry that the age gap between my kids and a baby with just get wider and wider since my levels are just never normal to conceive….ok enough ranting, I do feel better though, just needed to get that off my shoulders…sorry for being the downer
Well I will have to admit that I have typed a long winded post twice now, because I forgot to log in first. So, I will not get to say what I was going to because now my brain is tired!!!! I will post it tommorrow! I did want to let you guys know that my test came back negative. I will write more tommorrow. I am tired and I am going to bed. I have studied for 5hrs. Been in school for 3 and had to run errands. Good night everyone!!!!! Wishing you all BFP's!!!!
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Ok - as I waxed profane in my last post (is there anyone else out there?) I am driving myself crazy wondering if I've Oed already. I had a crazy amount of EWCM on Tuesday and a +OPK (historically I've Oed 2 days after +) my temp is pretty much on the regular course to O tomorrow and I still have the craziest O pains EVER. Oh yeah and WAY achy bbs. So then I start wondering how quickly an egg travels - i.e. say the egg releases at 10am is it floating around slowly enough that if swimmers enter the cave at 10pm could they get together? The main reason I am flipping myslef out is that I am pretty sure I got strep from my DS and am probably going to have to work really hard to "seek a donation." How sad is that? And this week - like I could handle another little one! Ugh...like any of you want to listen to this rambling...just sitting here alone not feeling real well and resenting they feeling that it all comes down to one day
Thanks for listening!
Nicole - How ya doing tonight? Just thinking about you...
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Hello Ladies - just wanted to pop in real quick and give you an update. I had an HSG test done last Thursday and my right tube is blocked (same side as ectopic). I'm fine. No temping or OPK and it's wonderful. Using protection this month as I'll be in Florida next month and don't want to deal with possible pregnancy. (Sounds crazy, but the timing is really bad.) I would have to have the US about 2 days before we leave and I just don't want to deal with negative news before I leave. Anyway, I feel sure I will get pregnant and it will happen in the Lord's timing and I can't speed it up. So, I wait... but at least it's stress free.
Miss everyone and I'll pop in here and there. Hope everyone had a great Mother's Day!!!
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Tandi/ Berta - Welcome to the land of calm...I admit that I am still temping a little bit to try to pinpoint O day (ALWAYS between 19/ 20) just so I know if I have to "force" (due to DH's travel schedule) BD...not even force...just make sure we're frisky But, like you, I know I O, my lovely doc is sure I don't need clomid (which is just fine) and he feels quite confident that at least one tube is open due to my m/c. As I said to Nicole earlier, the only universally accepted hiccup is only having 4cm each side...which plenty of sisters on this board get pg at that length...it just takes a while. Likewise, I just turned 35 and was only pg last year...so there's no questions about my ability to conceive or carry a healthy pregnancy. All that to say, Berta, is that yup - once you get a doc you feel is being supportive and really listening to you it really gets put in perspective. My doc has said all along that if ANYONE were to get pregnant after TR, my history is as good as anyone's...so why are we all having a hard time - heh?
Bottom line, I'm still tracking a bit as if we don't BD when we're Oing than there's no shot...and with DH's travel schedule I sometimes have to make accommodations (i.e. a quicky when we're both exhausted and he's sat on a plane all day...that's tomorrow night...LOL). But no more "day 14" POASing, no more temping through the LP, etc. If I'm meant to get #4...I will. Not that this was about me...just wanted to ramble and say that I'm with you...Me and doc agreed to an HSG in Sept....so, like your view Berta - that will be it
In the present - thanks so much for the concern for DS. Like my older son, the doc confirmed he's got sleep apnea and is even loosing weight because his tonsils are so enlarged he's not eating properly. So, it's looking like I get a night in the hospital with him in early June when he gets everything out (he has to stay overnight because he's not yet 3). Such fun!
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Danelle- Thanks so much for your kind words. I actually showed 5 months worth of charts to one doc. She said they were useless and that I needed to wait at least 6 months before she would give me clomid since 'most people get pregnant in that time anyway.
Neither of the docs I've talked to will give clomid without an HSG and I refuse to do it for personal reasons so for now I'm just relaxing about the whole thing. If when we get to virginia and I feel like dealing with all the **** from a doc again I might try to get some again who knows.
I do feel at peace about the whole thing now. I can't control it, being upset isn't going to make it better so I might as well enjoy all the wonderful things in my life and leave that up to the Lord and his timing.
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Well like my dr said....I've already established that I do O...and as long as BD CD 12-18....bound to hit the fertile days...and as with all pregnancies...we only have 25% chance of getting pg to begin with....or something like that. You can do everything RIGHT and still not get PG...as we all have.... so taking the 'science' out of it....you STILL Have that percentage of getting pg! So eliminate the stressors..... the 'have to' this and that.... and inner peace you will find. Took me a while...but I found it.
we all will get our bfps in due time.. when it is suppose to happen...... we will one day be comparing birth delivery stories!!!! on the chance it doesn't happen for me...... then I'll be right here cheering all of you on!!!! I think I might still have my cheer uniform from HS...LOL.
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I try not to stress, but I am sure all I do adds stress...I like the OPK sticks and the temping, my O date moves around it seems...but I find my toughest part is just waiting to O and then wondering if we caught it...hard to be stress free...but we can sure take measures to help with stress levels. You seem to feel a sense of peace and that is awesome. Watch it will happen quick for you cuz of your new direction.
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Danelle...for the first time since TR...I have a new perspective, that I can say...really was starting to emerge before seeing the dr...however i think.....I just needed a 3rd impartial party to 'bounce' thoughts on.... and well...... I get it.
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Berta - It sounds like you have really worked out a path that is ideal for you, and that is SO great. I am so happy the Dr. was great and is willing to work with you. TTC is a tough journey for sure, I never thought for one minute it would be as hard as it is. We all just have to be patient though and our time will come. Glad to hear you are in good spirits!!!
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Renee...YAY!!!!! Glad FF gave ya an O date....!
I was able to get records-- no problemo...I think they just wanted me outta there quick and didn't say boo....who knows.... Anyhoots....that dr and that chapter closed.
Decisions....decisions.....
As you all know I kinda chucked all the 'stuff' avenue this month, and happy to say I will NOT be using anything next month or the month after that. All the temping, opk etc etc...really has helped establish that I do O, and the approx week of O....so therefore... i really dont need anything more to stress about. I'll be selling all my stuff on ebay...gone outta here. I'm done stressing over this month after month. I had a GREAT appt with my dr...who by the way- wrote everything I wanted from all the b/w testing FSH, estradiol..etc etc...and the HSG...and a referral to an RE. Bottom line...I do O, I have gotten pg 2x and I'm not PG due to my age. Period. Even if tubes are blocked or not blocked....still wouldn't change the fact I am 38 knocking on 39..... so with that said.... I will wait 3 months and if not pg by then, I will get the HSG done. If tubes are open then, After that...I will not be doing anything 'other' to get pg.. no testing, no fert meds nothing. If closed, well then that's it. If it is meant to happen, it will happen without doing all this stuff that is creating stress. Talking with my dr, I think I saw the light...so to speak. E/P wasn't caused by TR, as the baby did make it PAST the reconnection area....and M/C- baby did make it to the uterus..... so..... it's a gamble with anything and I'm literraly done with pinpointing everything, days to bd etc etc
Did any of that make sense???
Anyhoots...great appt, great advice and i feel great calm. I'm 38, what will be will be. Funny...before DH I would have NEVER considered having a baby....and now because of his decision NOT to have one earlier....I have the world upon my being to be the one to get PG... well...done.... enough stressing, even trying to correct things, give him what he chose NOT to have or whatever. Not saying this is not what I want...I do...but too much pressure put upon us ladies because THEY chose NOT to have children, we did and CHOSE to not have any more at one point........ unfair as it is.... if DH doesn't have a child, then it is because of HIS decision NOT too when he could. Make sense? I'm not taking the load of 'it's me' that can't 'give' him a child. Enough already!!!
I have literally spent enough (we have) money on the hopes to have a baby thru ivf AND tr......now time to sit back and just 'let it happen'.
Ramble or not...sorry....but kinda just getting it off my shoulders.
I'll check back laterz for posts I missed. My side is still hurting and I'm gonna lay down for a bit.
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danelle, Thank you, you are such a sweetie. Yes, I'm still hanging in here. I've got cramping and lower back pain today...so I'm thinking AF is trying to make an appearance. I hope to catch up this evening. Thanks for thinking about me. Heidi
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Thanks girls for the words of encouragement. My flow is normal, so I'm not worried. I think I need to just chuck the whole POAS thing out the window and just wait till CD 34. If no AF, then I'll just go in and have bloodwork. It's just such a hard habit to break.
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Tandi - Missed your post, I was typing one at the same time. Sorry if you are in for another long cycle. I feel for you, I can't imagine how hard that must be. I look at your temps and man your chart looks just so unbelievably controlled. I know at one time you wanted Clomid....would someone give it to you easier if you showed them your charts and what is going on with your body? Just a thought, although I know you also stated now isn't the best time to get pregnant for you...You have such a great spirit and are so patient...an amazing woman who WILL get that little bean!
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